It’s not okay to give in.
When things happen to me, as I am sure with most, it’s never one little easy controllable thing at a time, but more often, a barrage of shit being hurled at you at break neck speed.
This entry is coming to you live from Danville, IL. We’re (most of us anyway) are here to support my sister as we’re preparing for her mastectomy on Tuesday. It’s a lot of people, a lot of personalities, and a lot of stressors. And I am quite sure we’re all afraid on some level of something.
It’s what’s going on with Keri. I don’t know, nor can I pretend to understand what she’s going through. It’s one thing to lose a tooth… it’s a whole other to lose your breast. And I can’t imagine for one millisecond how scary that must be. Followed by radiation, and in between, a million opinions (mine included) on how things are or should be or what we’ve heard by whom.
None. Of. It. Matters.
Keri, you are looking this monster right in the face. You have support for sure, but the fight is yours. And I want you to know Keri, that it’s okay to be afraid. I would think there’s something wrong with you if you told us any different. You don’t have to be strong. You don’t have to be brave. You don’t have to be anything more than what you are, right now, right in this moment.
Be whatever it is that you need to be in this moment. The only way, my sweet sweet sister to get through it, is to go through it. One step at a time. Some days, those steps will be so afraid that you don’t think you can move. Some days, they’ll be charging full force into the next part of the battle, and some days, they’re likely to be exhausted steps, completely tired. Some days, you’ll want to give up. Some days you won’t. Some days you’ll curse God. Some days, I hope you’ll thank God. I hope you thank him more than the days you curse Him.
Jennifer and I are here for you always. It doesn’t matter how many miles will ultimately separate us as we return home, Jennifer to California, me to Arizona, by way of Denver. We are your sisters. We are your first friends, your best friend. We are your girl gang. And we have your back.
So when you need to cry, CALL US. When you need to laugh, CALL US. When you need to scream, CALL US. When you just need to talk it out, CALL US.
Remember that God has equipped you to get through this battle, this one right in front of you, and there’s nothing He’ll put in front of you that you can’t handle.
Give it a read. Keep praying. Keep putting one foot in front of the other. Remembering always, that we’ll walk with you for Every. Single. Step.
I love you Keri.