Dear Aunt Diana…

Dear Aunt Diana…

Aunt Diana 1Aunt Wanda called today.  It’s nice to hear from her and the goings on of home.  Nancy was home to visit in January, and the work on Joe and Shana’s home continues, though not without little mishaps.  I’m sure you know all about it.

It’s only been two months you’ve been gone, and the sting of your loss is just as painful in this moment as in the moment Dad called me to let me know your time was short, or when Carolyn called to tell me your suffering had ended. The sting is as powerful as coming to terms with to read or not to read my thoughts about you at your memorial.  It. Still. Stings. 

Your loss, and really it’s silly to consider it loss, but your loss hurts me more than any loss  I’ve felt to this point. The loss of friends, of grandparents, of older aunts and uncles, none of it hurts quite like this.  The loss of a relationship, nope, doesn’t hurt nearly as much as your loss.

I really have to think the imprint you left on my life is so indelible and so deep and that’s why this hurts to the degree that it does. Your capacity to love and to give and to do so without expectation is perhaps the greatest lesson you were able to instill into me, or into anyone else who was so blessed to have the opportunity.

Anyway, Aunt Wanda said she’s sending along a package, something that you had crafted and she thought I’d like to have.  You know what I’d really like to have is just five more minutes with you to do absolutely whatever.   Don’t get me wrong, I still get it… in my own little way, when I’m in the car and a song comes on, or you just need to let me know you’re still here and you’ll never really leave so long as we remember you.

So I just thought I’d drop a line today to let you know I still love you big, am grateful beyond any measure for what you continue to bring to my life.

Love,

Elizabeth.

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